I love it when songs have a little unforeseen kink to them. There’s something about the subtly that puts a smirk on your face and gets you thinking about the dirty things–but doesn’t practically require you rub one out before continuing your day.::coughAvantcough::
Robin Thicke’s Something Else album is all sweet and cuddly in comparison to Sex Therapy, but there’s one song that has an especially kinky culprit amidst the sugary sweetness: “You wanna touch yourself when you see me.” There’s also this Norwegian wood reference that I giggle at more than anything.
Jordan Knight’s “Give It To You” is entirely about sex, but there’s something about the pop-carnival sound from the New Kid on the Block who starts with the man-in-your-dreams cliche, but manages to keep “show me where and I’ll taste you there” lost in the refrain.
Raphael Saadiq doesn’t just surprise you–he blows your mind. The song is titled “Let’s Take A Walk” and the song starts: “This place is crowded. Don’t know about you. I need some sex. Some sex with you.” I know you have to follow the link, but you should really watch this: the music+video is strangely reminiscent of the bowling porn Gutterballs in The Big Lebowski.
Know any other jams that fit the unexpectedly explicit MO?
I feel like I’m directing you to a porn website with the title of this post. And I almost am, but this has less money shots and more foreplay.
::distant female hurrahs::
You might remember a previous post complaining about the absolute un-sexiness that is Robin Thicke’s Sex Therapy video, while trumpeting the likes of Usher’s Hey Daddy and Trading Places.
Well, do I have news for you. Robin’s managed to pull himself out of the creepy videoland with It’s In The Morning featuring Snoop. Maybe it’s the content, maybe it’s the kitchen table, and maybe it’s the line “Let me put some cream in your coffee.” Whatever it is, I give two enthusiastic thumbs up to this video.
Also, to vindicate the awfulness that is his Sex Therapy video, I found this flash mob video. Nice.
Sadly, after how much I praised Usher, he went and thoroughly disappointed me. There Goes My Baby and Lil Freak are godawful. The first just isn’t what I hoped for, and the second is downright disturbing. I feel bad for the girl in the video. It’s a damn shame, the songs are super sexual.
But let’s end on a good note:
I would like to give my heartfelt consent to Ciara’s Ride and Trey Songz’s Neighbors Know My Name. Ciara rocks it because the lyrics are direct, the music has rhythm, and the way she moves that body I can’t doubt that they love the way she rides. And that girl can dance. Trey’s video is just hot. Big surprise, coming from the man who sings I Invented Sex.
It’s Sunday night. I’m lying in bed, reading Sherlock Holmes, drinking white wine, and listening to Pandora’s ‘Sex Therapy’ station. This, in itself, is wonderful. However, Pandora is mixing one hell of a night. It’s too bad this bed is so small and I’m the only one in it. I can’t say I’m planning on taking advantage of Pandora’s hotness, but in case you are, let me share this oh-so-sexy playlist for your next late-night rendezvous.
- Right and a Wrong Way, Mario
- This Woman’s Work, Maxwell
- Neighbors Know My Name, Trey Songz
- Anonymous, Bobby Valentine
- Hey Daddy, Usher
- Falsetto, The-Dream
- Jupiter Love, Trey Songz
- Echo, R. Kelly
- It’s Yours, J. Holiday
- H.A.T.E.U, Mariah Carey
- Sex Therapy, Robin Thicke
- Like I Do, R. Kelly
- Wanna Love U Girl, Robin Thicke
- Read Your Mind, Avant
- Ordinary People, John Legend
- So Beautiful, Musiq Soulchild
- Cry Out For Me, Mario
- Acension, Maxwell
- Please, Anthony Hamilton
- So Anxious, Ginuwine
- Until the End of Time, Justin Timberlake
- Trading Places, Usher
Yes, yes, yes.
I don’t currently have a TV, and I haven’t really watched MTV or VH1 since middle school (the last one I remember seeing on TRL was ‘I Want It That Way’). But I’ve seen enough of Youtube to think music videos are still surviving.
As of late, I’ve gotten into Robin Thicke’s Sex Therapy. Like, way into it. I think it’s easily one of the sexiest albums ever. A friend of mine’s first reaction was, “Oh people would totally do it to this.” Clearly, they call it baby-making music for a reason. It’s explicit. It moans. It’s got sound effects for the morning wood boner poke. Hell yes.
The title song ‘Sex Therapy’ is just fucking hot. A teaser: “Loud if you want to/Scream if you want to.” So wouldn’t you think a song like that would have one hell of a music video? Well, here it is. I think it’s weird and spastic, and watching it makes me cringe.
Other disappointing music videos: R. Kelly ‘Bump ‘N Grind’ and Next ‘Too Close.’ I’m sure there are more, but who wants me to ruin another good song?
If you need a pick-me-up after this depressing array, check out Usher. Sure, his dancing is enough to turn me on, but the rest of the videos are hot, too: Hey Daddy and Trading Places. If only ‘That’s What It’s Made For’ had a video. sigh.
“My guilty pleasures have been outweighing my good health.” – Robin Thicke
Inspired by this lyric from the incredibly sexy album Sex Therapy: The Session, I’ve pondered my own delinquent delights. In no particular order…
1. Falling asleep while reading.
Virtue: Waking up refreshed. Vice: Not reading.
Virtue: Good texting. Vice: Bad texting.
3. Spontaneous Car Rides and/or Road Trips
Virtue: Cheap pizza at 3 am. Vice: Gas money.
4. Processing at PB
Virtue: Visible progress. Vice: Impossible to accomplish.
5. Quick Trip (QT)
Virtue: Endless drink dispensers. Vice: It’s a gas station.
Virtue: Everything. Vice: Everything.
Virtue: On my computer. Vice: Will watch at any hour of the day.
8. Playstation 2
Virtue: Single player entertainment. Vice: Back pain.
9. Baking/Cooking Magazines/Books
Virtue: Recipes. Vice: Recipes I can’t make.
10. Writing Utensils
Virtue: Useful. Vice: Always have too many.
11. Donuts and Processed Cheese
Virtue: Delicious. Vice: Socially unacceptable to like them as much as I do.
I listened to non-stop soul/r&b stations on Pandora for a week while I did the baby names project. Alicia Keys, John Legend, Baby Face, Robin Thicke, Ne-Yo, Raphael Saadiq, Usher, John Mayer, Marvin Gaye… Listening to too much of that stuff is dangerous. It pretty much left me wanting to be in a relationship, or be heartbroken about one, or be getting back together with one, or not in one at all but having a sexy forbidden affair. Yikes. Thankfully I finished the project and returned to my apartment where my itunes computer (yes, I have two, one with itunes and one with Pandora) is not so sexually charged.
But listening to all that music and spending 22 days in Legend Lyric Land pointed out a tragic flaw in my character: I am never exactly ready when a guy does something “right.” Now, I’m not saying that it so rarely happens and guys never know what’s going on. Not at all true. But for all my hating on romance and happy endings and all things love, I always swoon when a guy does something I like. For instance, I find kisses on the forehead or top of the head to be the sexiest things ever. I’m always harboring an inward starry-eyed grin whenever a guy does that–even if it happened every day I would react that way. But that along with so many other things, like a guy saying he misses you just when you needed to hear it most, are the kinds of actions that I’m never ready for and I’ll always let my guard down. And if I’m not careful, that will come back to hurt me.
I’m blaming soul music for my sappy weakness. I’m also blaming it for this ad that appeared on my Facebook: